March 24, 2010 by Ellen Stimson in Family, Worries

We have been having a run of trouble. There is an old Uncle Remus quote that I love. “You can’t run from trouble…ain’t nowhere that far”
It’s true. Living your life with intention does not protect you from trouble showing up at your door. It should provide a map though for how to navigate it. There is no way to avoid trouble or pain either one but I have always believed that suffering is optional. Sometimes in the middle of the struggle that’s hard to remember.

Yesterday I got to feeling sorry for myself as my Gram used to say. We have a problem without an obvious solution that could affect our family for years to come. Oh we keep taking swipes at it. Nobody is giving up, but there is the truth that the solutions may only be band-aids and that healing and forgiveness are different from mending. They take a long time and people want them in different quantities and often at different times.

I may have to retool my definition of family. We may have to find new ways of being together and new family groupings that are less inclusive but possibly more enjoyable. I an having to reconsider what family means. And the things we have all enjoyed in the past may be different from the things we will enjoy in the future. My notions of togetherness may not work for everyone. My ideas of big gatherings and group travel may actually only be fun in theory now. So will I be forever disappointed or will I learn how to be glad for what we have instead of what we don’t?

And does thinking about all of this help me create a life as oppose to react to one? Or does it instead make the current dilemmas just harder to solve for worrying about what might happen next? I am a big believer in accepting what is and making the best of it. I believe that and then I still go and sulk in the corner over what isn’t or isn’t anymore, or anyway isn’t right now.

We have some trouble. Spring is barely here and I am needing the sun. Dreary wind and rain and snow make it harder to be cheerful in the face of difficult problems. Maybe we will take a little band of us off to somewhere sunny and glom onto what we still have. Making adjustments…..making adjustments.


  • Kate

    I hear you my friend. And I know you have been a beacon of hope for me through my struggles. Acceptance for dreams lost is hard won, but the new pictures will come. They will.

  • tk


  • Mighty Morphin' Mama

    Thank you for stopping in to encourage. I am thinking of you and your situation. I am sorry for the hurts you are going through. I hope it gets easier soon and that healing AND acceptance are in your future.

  • Bia

    here, to hopefully put some humor into those troubles, are some very wise words from none other than Dr. Seuss:

    I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind.
    Some come from ahead and some come from behind.
    But I've bought a big bat. I'm all ready you see.
    Now my troubles are going to have troubles with me!

    blessings to you all.

  • starrlife

    Ahhhh, the heart wants what it wants despite the mind trying to make it want something else. So sorry for all of the difficult times and hugs, sunny thoughts and breath coming your way by internet. Wish I could do more.

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